Feeling Overwhelmed?

Linda and I have been reading Brene Brown’s new book “The Atlas of the Heart.” It is a beautiful read which helps to map out the language of our emotions.

As wellness coaches, we often hear the same words used to describe the feelings that keep us feeling stuck, and overwhelmed is a big one.

There are stages that lead us to this place of overwhelm and perhaps if we can understand the road we take to get there, we may be able to re-route ourselves before we arrive.

Walk with me through this familiar scenario….

It begins with a worry, a feeling that we may not be able to handle some upcoming future situation or event. This worry leads us to a feeling of stress and anxiety including elements of unpredictability and feeling out of control. Most of us will allow this stress to taunt us over and over for hours, days, weeks, months. Disrupting our sleep, our connections, our focus, our happiness, causing both physical and mental reactions. Eventually, a sense of overwhelm sets in. This feeling of inability to function, to process, to move through the sludge leaves us with the coping strategy of avoidance. Zigzagging around and away from that thing that feels like it’s consuming us. Knowing that you want and need to work through this, but how? Where to even begin? It’s so much easier to just sweep it under the rug, to keep chugging along.

But is it really easier?

Jon Kabat-Zinn describes overwhelm as the all-too-common feeling that our lives are somehow unfolding faster than the human nervous system and psyche are able to manage well. He suggests (and we agree) that mindful play, or non-agenda, non-doing time, is the cure for overwhelm.

So how do we do this?

1) Reconnect with your child-like sense of self. If you have children, get on their level. Dig, run, laugh, get dirty, PLAY! If you do not have children, remember what it felt like to do for the sake of doing. Take your shoes off and walk barefoot, paint, dance, cook…whatever brings you joy. Simply give yourself permission to tap into that pleasure center in your body and mind that feel light, spontaneous, and free.

2) Take a personal day. I know this may not always be possible. Curcumstacially you may only be able to take half a day, a few hours, whatever you can afford, is good enough. Take this time to recharge energetically. To allow yourself to get lost, to wander without a plan, to let your instincts guide you towards what you need during each particular moment as they unfold.

3) Journal. Write your thoughts down on paper. Allow for an unconscious stream of words to explode on the pages. Write until your mind is empty and your hand hurts :) There is no room for judgment here. There should be no critics, no “shoulds”. Just an honest outpour of the feelings you are currently feeling. Give them a name. Then try to let them go. Perhaps even burn them in a fire and visualize them losing their power and hold over you.

4) Meditate. When feeling overwhelmed, silence is your best friend. Give yourself permission to sit, eyes closed, breath full and steady. Enjoy the simplicity of breathing in and out of the nose. With no other agenda. With no end result. Just be still and breathe. Allow everything inside you to settle, to restore that beautiful mind of yours. To repair your nervous system. To be.

5) Lastly, Share. It can be so powerful to share your story with someone. You never know how your life can impact those around you. How similar we are to one another until you open up and give in to your vulnerability.

“Whatever you are going through now is preparing you for your next big breakthrough.”

“Start by doing what is necessary; Then do what’s possible; Then suddenly you are doing the impossible.”

“She belived she could, so she did.”

“Let your mind and heart rest for a while. The world will not stop spinning for you, but you will catch up. Take a rest.”